9 Most Outrageous Children’s Toys Ever Made

There are a lot of children’s toys on the market, and some of them are pretty “out there.” However, some children’s toys are so outrageous you might not even believe they exist. These nine children’s toys are so crazy and shocking that we had to make a list of them. Check them out for yourself below, and keep your kids away!

Number Nine: Pole Dancing Barbie.

The pole dancing barbie may not have been marketed for kids, but with the word “barbie” in it, you can bet some clueless parents bought it for their kids anyway. It was released in the U.K. in 2009 and was pulled from shelves soon after.

Number Eight: Harry Potter Quidditch Broom.

A Harry Potter Quidditch broom might sound harmless in theory, but there’s a little more than meets the eye with this one. It vibrated to simulate the sensation of “flying”, but in reality it simulated something much more sexual. One man was even documented buying the toy for his wife to use during sex.

Number Seven: Baby’s First Baby.

Yup, baby’s having a baby! Baby’s baby is pregnant, too, and grandma baby even has stretch marks. Apparently, the toy’s creator made this as a social commentary about the nature of children’s toys marketed to young girls.

Number Six: L and M Import 9/11 Plane.

Though this plane was reportedly not manufactured to resemble the September 11 attacks, the resemblance is truly uncanny. Throw in the fact that the toy came printed with an item number that read “9011” on it, and the deal was done. If that’s not outrageous, we don’t know what is.

Number Five: Poo-Dough.

Poo-Dough is like Play-Doh, but with poop. The dough allowed kids to craft their own turds, even letting them put little pieces of “corn” in them. It was one of the best-selling children’s toys in 2013, despite many a horrified mom.

Number Four: Aquapet.

The Aquapet was designed to be an interactive electronic toy that can respond to children. However, the actual toy resembles genitalia more than it does an actual toy. According to the toy’s designers, they simply did not notice.

Number Three: The Breast Milk Baby.

Yes, this doll will simulate the breastfeeding experience for young girls. Because you’re never too young to learn! Said nobody ever about children’s toys.

Number Two: Kaba Kick Toys

If you want to play Russian Roulette but would rather not get shot, why not give Kaba Kick a try?! The toy simulated Russian Roulette, except instead of bullets, it shoots soft, pink “hippo kicks.” As far as children’s toys go, this is an epic fail.

Number One: Police Electric Baton Shock.

Finally, perhaps the most outrageous “toy” ever made isn’t really a toy at all. This fake taser is not actually a fake at all. It gives real shocks, and while the shocks may only be a meager 3.6 volts, it’s still incredibly dangerous to teach children that shocking other people at their expense for fun is perfectly OK. This fake taser can currently be bought online for just $3.50.